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 Outdoor / Hiking Humor
 Leopard vs Dachshund
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Ronbo
Senior Member

Edited by
Ron Paley

Maple Ridge, B.C.
Canada

1434 Posts

 Posted - 01/30/2004 :  07:47 AM  Show Profile  Reply to this posting
A wealthy man decided to go on a safari in Africa.

He took his faithful pet dachshund along for company.



One day, the dachshund starts chasing butterflies and before long the dachshund discovers that he is lost.



Wandering about, he notices a leopard heading rapidly in his direction with the obvious intention of having lunch.



The dachshund thinks, "I'm in deep trouble now!



Then he noticed some bones on the ground close by and immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching cat.



Just as the leopard is about to leap, the dachshund exclaims loudly, "Boy, that was one delicious leopard.



I wonder if there are any more around here?"



Hearing this, the leopard halts his attack in mid-stride, as a look of terror comes over him, and slinks away into the trees.



"Whew," says the leopard. "That was close. That dachshund nearly had me."



Meanwhile, a monkey who had been! watching the whole scene from a nearby tree figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the leopard.



So, off he goes. But the dachshund saw him heading after the leopard with great speed, and figured that something must be up.



The monkey soon catches up with the leopard, spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the leopard.



The leopard is furious at being made a fool of and says, "Here monkey, hop on my back and see what's going to happen to that conniving canine."



Now the dachshund sees the leopard coming with the monkey on his back and thinks "What am I going to do now?"



But instead of running, the dog sits down with his back to his attackers, pretending he hasn't seen them yet and just when they get close enough to hear the dachshund says:



"Where's that stupid monkey? I sent him off half an hour ago to bring me another leopard."



REMEMBER: IF YOU CAN'T DAZZLE THEM WITH BRILLIANCE, BAFFLE THEM WITH BULL%^&*
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BillyGoat
Advanced Member

Satirical photoshop junkie who frolics in the mountains of the Chilliwack River Valley

Chilliwack, BC
Canada

6944 Posts

 Posted - 01/30/2004 :  09:46 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Hehe...Good one Ronbo!

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"If the women don't find you handsome, they should at least find you handy"

Red Green
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trigger
Senior Member


New Westminster, BC
Canada

1138 Posts

 Posted - 01/30/2004 :  11:56 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Very funny.

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"Anything is Possible"

mick range
Extreme Hoser

Trail running, bike hucking, fast packing, beer drinking collector of pine cones on a day pass

AKA

Dances with Trees

Forest Gnome Cabin
Canada

13090 Posts

 Posted - 01/30/2004 :  1:57 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Classic!

bikerider
Senior Member

Road raging trail blazer

Surrey, B.C.
Canada

1722 Posts

 Posted - 01/30/2004 :  8:41 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
That one made me laugh out loud. Thanks for the laugh.
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